My hospital complaint – an update

Im fuming.  So super angry.

You remember the problems I had with one nurse in particular whilst in hospital? You can read about it here and here.

Well the ward manager just called me to let me know he had spoken to the staff concerned and that he hoped I would feel the matter was resolved.

Not so much, it turns out.

The nurse who laughed at me when I lay crying, who offered no help in changing my ileostomy bag or in showering, who wrote on my chart that I wasn’t in as much pain as I was telling her I was and who withheld pain relief, that one… Yeah, her response is that I only ever asked her for a towel so how should she know I needed help in the shower? No remorse, no realisation that she could have done more – its my fault for not asking.

He says that he told her as a SENIOR staff nurse that she should have been aware that a patient who has had major surgery three days prior should get more support and that she could have done more.

He says he showed her my chart and questioned why she didn’t give me more pain relief.  I asked her response he said “Well, nothing really”

He says that she “point blank” denies that she laughed at me.

What. The. Actual. Fuck??

I asked if he was ok with this? That his senior staff nurse had lied on a chart and withheld pain relief.  (I didn’t sleep at all that night, I sat up crying in pain, asking for pain relief again and again.  I was told I couldn’t have anything else till the dr prescribed it the next day.  When asked how much pain I was in 0 = none through to 3 = extreme, I was telling her 3, more than 3!!! Agony!!!! The next morning Timm came in and checked my chart, she had been writing 1s and 2s.  In the morning when they changed nurses, the new nurse came in to find me crying in pain, she checked my chart and immediately gave me a higher dose of Oramorph and said the doctors had prescribed me a higher dose than Id been given all night and that I could have been having it every two hours)

He says that the nurse has worked there for years and he knows her personally and he has never had another complaint against her so it is her word against mine.  He went on to say that *some* patients when they are on a lot of pain relief can be “confused” – he went on to say that of couuuuurse he wasn’t suggesting that *I* was confused but that it does happen.  I told him that two other patients on my ward were so appalled by what they heard and saw from this nurse that they gave me their names and phone numbers and said should I complain that they wanted to be able to say what they witnessed.  That one patient told me she was trying to reach her mobile phone so that she could film the nurse laughing at me whilst I lay crying and sobbing.  That I had been on the phone with my husband as she was laughing at me… That yes, I may have been tired, stressed, in pain and on painkillers but I was not making this up and I had witnesses.

He says that he has spoken to her and none of it will happen again, so do I feel it is resolved?

Is he crack-a-lacking me??

No, I told him, no.  This isn’t resolved as the nurse is showing no remorse and is denying she did anything wrong so how can I believe she won’t do it again?  If she thinks she did nothing wrong then who else is she doing it to? I said if that is as far as he can go then I will be making a formal compliant.  He asked if I would speak to the matron first.  I said I wanted to make a formal complaint as I need to know that she won’t treat others like this.

He said that sometimes complaints are valid and sometimes they aren’t and then went on to tell me that a patient had threatened to complain about him today but it was only because that person had “learning difficulties” – WHAT??? Surely these things should be confidential and he shouldn’t be telling me about other patients?!

So there’s my update, Im sorry if it is badly written but Im so ANGRY at them.  That they think it can all be brushed under the carpet.

I WILL be making a formal complaint and will take this forward as far as I have to.  I need to do it for peace of mind that next time it isn’t my mum, your nannan or Joe Bloggs’ uncle… That it’s not a frightened old lady or a young person who don’t have my voice.

Thank you for reading

 

Love Sam xx

15 replies
  1. sam
    sam says:

    Just to add that he said if I made a formal complaint, it would go to the matron, so I may as well just speak to her first. Timm just told me that the complaint goes to the chief exec of the hospital NOT the matron of the ward…

    Reply
  2. sam
    sam says:

    Just to add that he said if I made a formal complaint, it would go to the matron, so I may as well just speak to her first. Timm just told me that the complaint goes to the chief exec of the hospital NOT the matron of the ward…

    Reply
  3. Sue Smith
    Sue Smith says:

    Sam,
    I would speak to the other patients now and ask them to put in writing what they saw while it’s still fresh in their minds.
    Try not to let the so-and-so wind you up. It’s obvious they will all stick together and protct each other’s backs.
    ((hug to make you feel better))
    Did you get my email about the Stoma Care Open Day in Barnsley?

    Sue x

    Reply
  4. Sue Smith
    Sue Smith says:

    Sam,
    I would speak to the other patients now and ask them to put in writing what they saw while it’s still fresh in their minds.
    Try not to let the so-and-so wind you up. It’s obvious they will all stick together and protct each other’s backs.
    ((hug to make you feel better))
    Did you get my email about the Stoma Care Open Day in Barnsley?

    Sue x

    Reply
  5. Linda Swallow
    Linda Swallow says:

    Sam, that is absolutely disgusting and you don’t need me to tell you to take it further – this should never happen – not to anyone never mind someone who has just had major surgery. I really hope this individual gets her come uppence.
    I have seen you at school in the past whilst I have been taking my grandchildren and had no idea (no reason to really) what you were going through. I sincerely hope that you are on the up and up of what seems like ten years of hell. Linda Swallow

    Reply
  6. Linda Swallow
    Linda Swallow says:

    Sam, that is absolutely disgusting and you don’t need me to tell you to take it further – this should never happen – not to anyone never mind someone who has just had major surgery. I really hope this individual gets her come uppence.
    I have seen you at school in the past whilst I have been taking my grandchildren and had no idea (no reason to really) what you were going through. I sincerely hope that you are on the up and up of what seems like ten years of hell. Linda Swallow

    Reply
  7. Martyn Cleasby
    Martyn Cleasby says:

    Sam, that is beyond belief!! Take as far up as you possibly can…this woman should be castigated publically, sacked, and as far as I am concerned….hung,drawn and quartered!!
    Go for it, girl, and Timm too, I’m sure he can make it crack! xxx

    Reply
  8. Martyn Cleasby
    Martyn Cleasby says:

    Sam, that is beyond belief!! Take as far up as you possibly can…this woman should be castigated publically, sacked, and as far as I am concerned….hung,drawn and quartered!!
    Go for it, girl, and Timm too, I’m sure he can make it crack! xxx

    Reply
  9. Anita
    Anita says:

    Sam take it further. If this person thinks he can scare you into backing down, he is doing it to the wrong person. As long as you are well enough, go for it. I agree that you need to get the other patients to write down what they saw fist in case they forget so you have it all n paper. Be ready for a fight tho and when they try it step away and say ” i am not arguing, i am right and i am taking it to the top until that nurse admits fault and is disciplined” You deserve no less. Good luck. xxx

    Reply
  10. Anita
    Anita says:

    Sam take it further. If this person thinks he can scare you into backing down, he is doing it to the wrong person. As long as you are well enough, go for it. I agree that you need to get the other patients to write down what they saw fist in case they forget so you have it all n paper. Be ready for a fight tho and when they try it step away and say ” i am not arguing, i am right and i am taking it to the top until that nurse admits fault and is disciplined” You deserve no less. Good luck. xxx

    Reply
  11. Patricia
    Patricia says:

    OMG Sam ….. that is absolutely disgusting you’ve been through enough and now to be faced by an incompetent man saying “so do I feel it is resolved?” of course it isn’t resolved you definitely need to pursue this Sam it shouldn’t be happening on any level let alone when you have just had ‘major surgery’ and she wasn’t listening to you about how much pain you were in and actually ‘laughing’ at you 🙁 it literally makes my blood boil when I have read your blog about this particular incident, you must take it as far as you can and let the nurse get what she deserves …. (hopefully the sack) you need to contact the witnesses whilst it is still fresh in their minds which will add additional weight to your case. Good luck make your voice be heard…. sending love and hugs Patricia xx

    Reply
  12. Patricia
    Patricia says:

    OMG Sam ….. that is absolutely disgusting you’ve been through enough and now to be faced by an incompetent man saying “so do I feel it is resolved?” of course it isn’t resolved you definitely need to pursue this Sam it shouldn’t be happening on any level let alone when you have just had ‘major surgery’ and she wasn’t listening to you about how much pain you were in and actually ‘laughing’ at you 🙁 it literally makes my blood boil when I have read your blog about this particular incident, you must take it as far as you can and let the nurse get what she deserves …. (hopefully the sack) you need to contact the witnesses whilst it is still fresh in their minds which will add additional weight to your case. Good luck make your voice be heard…. sending love and hugs Patricia xx

    Reply
  13. Chloe
    Chloe says:

    Wow..just going through formal complaint myself for something not dissimilar to your experience. I just got a letter back from hospital..not worth the paper it’s written on. Feeling so kicked to the kerb, like I don’t matter one bit. What now!?

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.