What a year it has been! On 3rd September 2013 after over a week in hospital being pumped full of so many drugs, the decision was made that I needed to have my colon (my large bowel) removed. And so I was wheeled into surgery and this whole roller coaster began.
I was cut open and my colon was removed and the end of my small intestine was formed into an ostomy that was pulled through a little hole in my stomach and sewn into place. This was the start of my eight months with an ileostomy, wearing a bag on the outside of my stomach. In May 2014 I had the second part of my surgery to remove my ileostomy and form a j pouch that reconnects my bowel to my bum.
It’s been the hardest year of my life. There were times when I thought I couldn’t cope any more, that I was in so much pain and distress that I’d have done anything for it to stop. There were times when I felt so angry with the world, that it wasn’t fair that I had to deal with all of it. There were times when I shut out the people around me as I couldn’t deal with the guilt of seeing their sad faces when they looked at me.
Just over a year ago I started this blog as a diary, a way to talk about what was happening with my health and a cathartic exercise to help clear the stress and jumble of worries in my mind. I had absolutely no idea that it would be read all over the world thousands of times a day! That idea still blows my mind and I can’t tell you how grateful I am to each and every person who reads this blog.
What started as a personal therapy session has become a place to raise awareness of IBD, ulcerative colitis and crohns and also ostomies and pouch surgery. It’s become a place to talk about self esteem, body confidence and women’s issues. It’s become something that I’m so bloody proud of.
One year ago today as I lost my colon I thought about how it would improve my health and my quality of life. I had no idea that it would lead me on this fantastic journey that I’ve had the privilege of sharing with you. My illness and surgery always felt like a negative in my life, something that was unfair and made me angry, sad and fed up. This blog has allowed me to change my experience into something that could help others, it’s given me a new lease on life and shown me that I am stronger than I ever thought and that I have an opportunity to share that with other people.
So happy no coloniversary to me today!!!
Thank you for reading and sharing my journey, here’s to the next year!!!
Love Sam xxx