Hey there big man, I thought I’d better jot down a quick note to say hi. It’s that time of year again so I know your inundated but here’s what I’d like for Christmas.
My first wish was going to be for me to have no surgeries in 2016, but this damn illness of mine has scuppered that already and I’m going in January for a biggie!
They’re removing my Jpouch and creating a permanent ostomy. Some people might wish for Barbies at chrimbo, me? I’m getting a Barbie Butt.
They’re going to remove everything and give me a new stoma, as well as sorting the other issues caused by all this illness.
It’s a long and complicated surgery, so Father Christmas, can I ask to come through it safely. I’m scared you see and I just want to know that I’ll be ok and come home to my babies.
It would be nice if I had no other operations next year too, if you can manage it.
I’d also like to ask for an easier time in general. This year has been tough, I’ve been ill a lot and I hate the pressure it puts in my husband and kids. They deserve a wife and mum who isn’t always ill, tired or in bed.
Whilst you’re at it, keep them healthy, happy and ridiculously weird. They’re my favourite people in the world and I want to see them smile more.
Please let this surgery work. I just want to be well and not exhausted. I don’t think it’s too much to ask at 34 if you could stop me crapping myself. I just want to be normal. Not too normal!! I just don’t want to be sick any more.
Better treatments and a cure would be good too! Crohn’s and Colitis UK are doing well but a little festive, magical boost wouldn’t go amiss!
Help me to deal with all the new year is bringing me. I know I’ve had an ostomy before but this is all so permanent and to be honest, I’m scared I’m not going to deal with it very well. A sprinkling of bravery from you would help.
Santa, please bring me the courage to keep speaking out. Give me the ability to help others who are struggling and be a beacon of confidence, weirdness and hope for those following my footsteps with shitty chronic illness. Help me to carry on being The Poo Lady with pride.
I may not have been all good this year, but fingers crossed, I am still on the nice list!