Posts

I am an IBD Warrior, hear me roar…

When I was in hospital after my surgery I happened upon the hashtag IBD Warrior and seeing and reading other people’s IBD journeys, their struggles and ultimately the way they overcome what is such a shit illness inspired me and gave me the strength to move forward and to blog about my own journey.

So when I had my stoma photo shoot, we also did quite a few other photos with different styles.  The last few months have been tough but through it all I have tried to stay strong, keep fighting, be a kick ass woman and an IBD Warrior.

We all have an inner strength, sometimes that strength shows itself through having to fight for your life, sometimes its in a quiet confidence, at other times it is having to speak out for what is right or in being strong enough to just get through bad times one day at a time.  Even when we feel weak and defeated, we have within us the ability to adapt, to change and to move forward.  Sometimes it is easier to find than others.  Sometimes its so hard to find that we have to speak to friends or family and borrow a little bit of their strength till we can remember where our own warrior is hiding.

The next time I feel frightened and like the world is against me Ill look at these shots and remind myself of how far I have come and that I am an IBD warrior.  Hear me roar…

ibd warrior inner strength confidence ostomy ileostomy bag

ibd warrior inner strength confidence ostomy ileostomy bag

ibd warrior inner strength confidence ostomy ileostomy bag

ibd warrior inner strength confidence ostomy ileostomy bag

ibd warrior inner strength confidence ostomy ileostomy bag

ibd warrior inner strength confidence ostomy ileostomy bag

All photography by Timm Cleasby at The Picture Foundry

Love Sam xx

Joining the gym

Before I had kids I was skinny, I was a size 8 and then after having my first son I was a size 16. Since then I have gone up a bit and then down a bit but always ended around a 16.

I’m ok with this, I know I’m not skinny but I think I look alright! I have curves and boobs and hips and though I do still have the odd down moment, usually when shopping for clothes, I’m not desperately unhappy with my weight or figure.

However, since the op I have realised that I probably take my body for granted and don’t take care of it as much as I should. Though I do think about diet and love to cook, I don’t always eat as healthily as I could and my post surgery enforced diet with barely any fruit and veg hasn’t helped at all.

gym funnies

It has been almost 8 weeks since the operation and now is the time to start building my strength back up so I’m joining the gym. I’m a bit scared, the gym is obviously not my natural habitat but after all I have been through I think I owe it to myself to look after my body. I have five sessions with a personal trainer so I can be sure I’m doing the right exercises to aid recovery rather than do any damage to myself!

Timm and I are going for a family membership so we can both get fit and encourage the kids to do so too. We’re planning a weekly swimming session with the kids and then I’m going for a mix of gym sessions and classes. There’s aqua classes, low impact classes, yoga and Pilates for me to start with to ease me in and not be too much on my scar and stoma.

My eldest will also be able to use the gym which is a good way to encourage exercise and caring for his body from a young age. Despite being thin and having an athletic build, he dislikes group sports but does enjoy the gym at school and has weights in his room so it will be nice for him to get used to that environment from his youth.

My friend was telling me about her lifestyle changes in diet and exercise and how it’s changed her attitude so much. She feels strong and in control and I must admit to feeling a little jealous! So I’m joining the gym crowd, I’m taking control of the situation and have to make time for myself.

Whether I decide to keep the bag or to have the pouch surgery, I will have to have at least one more surgery and so I want to make sure that I’m the fittest I can be to face this. Recovering from surgery is bloody hard work! So I need to give myself the best fighting chance of coming out of all future ops strong and well.

mind-2-body-pilates-gym-inspiring-fitness-quotes-sayings-take-care-of-your-body-exercise-motivational-statements-famous-quotes

It’s too easy to make excuses. I don’t have time. I can’t afford it. It’s too difficult. But in reality if you really want to do it, then you have to make yourself try, you have to make time. If you can’t care for your own health and body, no one else is going to!

As a fully paid up member of the excuses club, I know them all. But in reality it comes down to a desire to start getting healthy, will power to keep going and hard work. There’s a quote I saw that said “no matter how slow you are moving, you are lapping the people on the coach” So I’m going to start, slowly at first but hopefully in a few months Ill be feeling stronger, fitter and healthier than ever!

So wish me luck!

Sam xx