Hello you lovely lot! Firstly thank you for so many wonderful messages of love and support, it means so much!
Secondly, I thought I’d take this time to explain a bit more about what’s gone on for the past week.
So last year, the tell tale lump appeared on my stomach, it was over the old stoma scar and I knew straight away it was another hernia. It hadn’t even been a year since the last hernia op and so I was really disappointed.
To be fair though, the hernias that we’re fixed in the surgery in 2016 were in the vertical scar through my belly button and also a parastomal hernia behind my stoma and these seemed to have held tight. This new one was just above my stoma in the old scar.
I had some scans last summer and the hernia was confirmed but I wasn’t ready to go ahead with another surgery. I was having a difficult time with me mental health and it all just felt too much.
Towards the end of last year, the hernia was causing more and more issues, I was getting leaks as it pulled my tummy out of shape, it was drawing my stoma inside my body and so getting bags to hold was a nightmare and it was painful.
I had my pre op appointment on 4th January 2018 and then was booked in for 12th March for the surgery. There was a blip where it was postponed till the 14th but then it reverted back to the original date.
I went in on Monday at 7am and was first up on the list. I spoke to the anaesthetic and to Mr Brown about what would happen and then went down to the operating theatre.
The anasthetists commented on how calm I was and how steady my heart rate was, which I found funny. I suppose after so many ops, you do get used to it and that unknown fear and worry is lessened. I also have such trust of the team in Sheffield that I knew I’d be looked after.
I came around a while later and though I wasn’t in pain, I was getting this feeling that I get after surgery, I think it’s a mix of the drugs, the anaesthetic, the adrenaline and being unconscious and I lay there feeling upset, panicky and tearful for no real reason!
I saw Mr Brown who confirmed that the hernia had gone down to my current stoma and as moving and resiting it is such a massive op that he had stitched it closed and meshed it again. This is a bit of a blow but honestly I was glad to wake up to the simple surgery recovery rather than a major op.
I just hope these fixes will hold now, the thought of more surgery is honestly too much to bear and so fingers crossed, this extra mesh will hold everything in place!
I was allowed home that evening, I HATE staying in hospital and I know I recover better at home in my own surroundings and so I was thrilled to get back to the kids and Timm.
I always forget just how much a general anaesthetic takes it out of you and I’ve slept pretty much for 3 days, though today I am starting to feel so much better and a lot more human.
Thanks again for so many lovely messages , from both family and friends and also readers of the blog. Each one means so much, especially when I haven’t even heard from my own mother so I’m feeling pretty shit! So it’s amazing to read so many supportive and caring messages and they honestly do help me a lot.
I have 2-3 weeks off work now and have spent the first week asleep! Timm is looking after me along with my kids and my big sis Lisa has FaceTimed me every day to chat which is fab. I hope I’ll be up to visitors in the next few days and can start to catch up with friends.
I need to be really careful for a few months to allow everything to fully heal, then the plan is to find a personal trainer with experience of abdominal surgeries and hernias to start to help me to rebuild some strength and feel strong, solid and able for the future.
Till then I’ll be found reading magazines, drinking tea and watching Netflix! Catch me on my Facebook, Twitter or Instagram